Is it possible that all of us have multiple personalities, lots of different parts to us that make up our whole self? Or is it just that we all have the potential to behave in many different ways, the freedom of choosing from options, these options being the way we want to handle a situation or respond to a person? Somebody please tell me how it is that one person can be completely different to their usual self at different points in time. Right now I am wondering if I can blame mood swings or an undiagnosed bipolar condition for my sister's strange behaviour. I simply don't understand it, is she just at a stage that every person goes through, where they are against everyone and simply opt for the opposing argument to you because it’s fun to see you get annoyed, does everyone go through a stage like that? Or is she just incredibly immature and has yet to learn the rules of social interaction or the skills of tact? Hopefully it is just a temporary thing. I don't want to have my feelings hurt or be rudely spoken to as often as I am now, for the reason that she is out to hurt people and does not understand the extent of damage her comments can cause. She has even reduced me to tears at times, even over a small matter, taking it too far and pushing people over the edge, uncaring.
Today I wrote this post after walking back home subsequent to an incident with my sister, realising that I felt the need to release my frustration regarding her immaturity. I do not want the person reading this to take sides or get the idea that I hate my sister and am too sensitive of others opinions. It's not like that. It is just that I am sick of her constantly reminding the family of our flaws, as though they are a nuisance to her and need to be rid of immediately to benefit her own needs. So here's what happened: the two of us had finished watching a Shrek video during lunch, when we played with the possibility of going to the park up the road, to breathe some fresh air and take some artistic-looking photos with the lush greenery of plants in the background. We’d done this same activity on other lazy weekend afternoons countless times before. The two of us were armed with both my borderline-broken camera and her phone, anticipating absence from the house for an hour or two. We left the house and paced up the road in the direction of the park, casually engaging in conversation of how we would spend the rest of the long weekend. However on arrival to our designated spot, we found the swing set occupied. Making the decision to come back to the playground later when the swings were free, we changed course and made our way to the tree we take photographic pictures in, as we do if the swings are not an option.
On the way to the tree, my sister murmured something about strings or swings to me, yet I didn’t hear her complete sentence. When I asked her to please repeat herself because I didn’t quite catch watch she had said, she heaved a heavy sigh and rolled her eyes at me, mentioning, “Never mind, it’s not my problem you are deaf and can’t hear me”. I wasn’t too taken aback or surprised by her response, which she so commonly points out if anybody fails to hear her. Attempting to move on from this tension in the conversation, I told her in what I thought was a mature move, that I am sorry if I didn’t hear you the first time, but there is no need to treat me so rudely. She just spat back in my face that I couldn’t handle any negativity thrown my way by people and that I was a big baby. If this was how she was going to be during our time at the park, I might as well go back home, I thought, and so I did, turning in the opposite direction to the tree and back in the direction we came. Not surprisingly, she followed close behind me and continued her repeated outbursts along the lines of “Stop being a princess, just because you aren’t getting your own way.” I did not respond, choosing to ignore her comments and hopefully she would leave me alone. No such luck. When we reached home, surprising my parents with such a soon return, she complained to them of my how I was being uncooperative and chucked the sads, whilst failing to recount the part she had played in causing the whole thing. For most of the afternoon she did not speak to me, rather nagged my mum about when she would be allowed to cook, impatience obviously sounding through her whinging.
What I can’t comprehend is how she can be so cruel to her own family members, and blame everybody else for everything when she is the usual culprit who blows things out of proportion. It seems so silly to think that we had a fight over mishearing someone, but I would like to think that I handled the situation in an appropriate manner by putting out the source of the problem. She’s been known on one occasion to drive my mum to swear and yell at her, whilst her own expression remains free of compassion or sympathy. She will spend hours on the computer after school, and sometimes skips Friday night movies with the family to do her own thing instead. But one of the things that confuses me most is how come other moments we gossip together about people at school, reminisce memories of primary school and share sisterly info with one another before bed? We trust each other enough to share secrets, yet we still continue to treat the other person horribly, it baffles me. Do all sisters have a relationship like ours? Is it just that because we are so close and I spend so much time with her that I notice her flaws, and other families have this exact same problem? Are we supposed to have fights, so we can strengthen our relationship as sisters?
This never used to happen when we were both younger. Perhaps it is because our adult personalities are coming into existence now, leaving behind the kind-hearted sweetness that went with childhood, meaning that there are more chances for our adult personalities to clash now? It seems this is a matter that only maturity, brought about in time, can fix.
No comments:
Post a Comment